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Last Updated: May 20, 2007 - 10:48:48 AM
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A bogus love triangle that is best avoided
Apr 21, 2007 - 2:13:28 PM
The performances leave you cold and shivery, waiting for one moment to connect with the characters. That moment never comes.

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[RxPG] Film: 'Kya Love Story Hai!'; Starring: Tusshar Kapoor, Ayesha Takia, Karan Hukku; Directed by Lovely Singh; Rating: *

Two of 'hero' Tusshar Kapoor's sidekicks look at each other and say, 'Nowadays, only Yash - uncle has successes.' No truer words are spoken in this bogus love triangle that goes from corn to corniest with no break to feel the ache caused by every tepid take.

There's something immensely graceless in a film about a loser who befriends and courts with pursed lips and tight jaws, signifying that strange and outdated concept known as 'silent love'.

In comparison, the other man - comes across smelling like roses. He reminds you of all those lonely eligible bachelor-tycoon types from Vinod Khanna in 'Chandni' to Himanshu Malik in 'Tum Bin'. The spunky lass Kajal - loves the loser who has a permanent hangdog expression, as though he has just come out of a terrible illness and is in desperate need of sympathy.

Sympathy is what the makers of this anaemic love story need for attempting a tale like this.

Material for a tele-film is turned into a baggy feature bogged down by cardboard characters and sidekicks who chase everything in skirts and bikinis.

The South African beaches offer the director a chance to focus his creaky vision on butts and bosoms. Alas, voluptuous female forms cannot compensate for a lack of vigour and contours.

The script - is what a love-struck adolescent would write for a school competition. It portrays the characters as a bunch of nerds best left in the pages of a pavement pulp novel for girls between the ages of 9 and 12.

Last week, we saw a superbly knitted script in 'Life Mein Kabhi Kabhee'. This week we see a film in search of a script.

The editing by Steven Bernard alternates courtship scenes between Kapoor and Takia with comic relief. But what relief do we obtain from the tedium of watching a feature film that mistakes cinema for the home medium?

The performances leave you cold and shivery, waiting for one moment to connect with the characters. That moment never comes.

A word of advice. Watch Kareena Kapoor's sizzling item song at home and stay away from this dead-at-the-centre love triangle about a boy who deserves no love, a girl who deserves more love, a suitor who deserves no-more love and an audience that deserves the cinema that it gets.

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